With all the things you have to juggle now, spending time wondering and worrying about the adoption process is the last thing you need to be doing. Here is a brief overview of the process. Keep in mind each case is unique. We can talk you through your case in detail when you are ready.
STEP BY STEP ADOPTION
Step 1: Contact an Adoption Professional
Contacting a licensed adoption agency and talking with a team member can help you calmly discuss your concerns and options. The team at Ka Makana offer a safe and non-judgmental environment to talk about pregnancy, parenting, adoption, and abortion. Our adoption professionals will go over what the adoption process would look like for you in your specific situation and state, as well as whether an adoption plan is the best option for you.
Step 2: Discuss Details of Adoption Plan
If you decide adoption is the best choice for you and your baby, you and your Ka Makana team member will talk in-depth and create a personalized adoption plan. We are professionals who can help you figure out what type of adoption would be the best for you.
Some questions you might have:
What degree of openness do you want: open, semi-open or closed?
What qualities do you want your child's adoptive parent(s) to have?
How do you envision your hospital experience?
Ka Makana will send you a physical or digital packet of educational information. If you want to take the next step in creating an adoption plan, your packet will also include a questionnaire for you to fill out. The form includes general questions about yourself and the future you hope to provide for your baby. All of the information you provide to us is completely confidential. Keep in mind if you ever want to make any changes to your adoption plan it is okay to do so at any point during your adoption. Your well-being is our first concern and we offer support before, during and after your placement of your baby.
Step 3: Choose an Adoptive Family
What type of family do you imagine for your baby?
The adoption process creates an opportunity to make that vision a reality by providing you with the opportunity to select the family you want for your baby.
The most important thing to consider when planning your child’s life is where you do you see yourself in it. Contact can include sharing photos, phone calls, video calls, texts, and in-person visits. Closed adoption is when you have no plan to continue contact after placing the child.
With the amount of amazing families looking to adopt it can be difficult to narrow it down to one. We recommend you write down the qualities that you want the adoptive family to have. This decision is life-changing for your child, for yourself and also for the adoptive family. Honesty will provide a stable starting point, especially with all the emotions that come with making this decision. There are no right or wrong feelings to have when considering what you want a family to be like. Being as specific as possible will help us connect you with families that will fit with what you are looking for. If you are having a difficult time making a list of qualities that you want the adoptive family to have, here are some suggestions:
What is important to you in a family?
What values are you wanting the family to have and practice?
Would you want to place your baby with a traditional marriage, same-sex or single?
What level of education would you like the adoptive parents to have?
In what location do you want your child to live?
Are you okay with them having other children or do you wish for this child to be their first?
Do you want your child’s adoptive parents to share your same religious beliefs or none at all?
Would you like the family to have a family pet or not?
Talking with the potential adoptive parents.
The search is over and now you’ve found an adoptive family profile that fits your vision of the type of parent(s) you want for your baby. Your Ka Makana team member will discuss with you the different forms of communication that you can have with the adoptive family and find one that makes you most comfortable. Ka Makana will reach out to the family and coordinate an introduction. Don’t be afraid to ask questions and bring up concerns that you might have. Take the time to develop a bond. You are making a permanent decision and you need to make sure you’re making the best choice for you and the baby.
Step 4: Birth of Your Baby
Making a hospital plan is a very important step in the adoption process. While nothing can completely prepare you for this emotional experience, having an adoption hospital birth plan in place before you go into labor tells your Ka Makana team member, the adoptive family, and the hospital staff exactly what you want your hospital time to be like so that your only focus is on you and the baby. Similar to your adoption plan, you are in complete control of your birth plan. This will be one of the most emotionally challenging parts of your adoption experience and discussing those feelings when making your hospital plan can help you feel more confident and in control of your delivery experience. Keep in mind if you ever want to make any changes to your adoption hospital plan it is okay to do so at any point during your adoption and even at the hospital. Here are some of the questions to consider while planning your hospital plan.
Which family members or friends do you want with you at the hospital?
Do you want the adoptive family in the delivery room?
Who will hold your baby first?
Do you want to have time with your baby alone, with the adoptive family, or both? Do you want no alone time with the baby?
Do you want any pictures taken of you with the baby? Do you want pictures taken with the adoptive family?
Step 5: Relinquishment/Consent
Relinquishment/Consent is when parents sign documents legalizing the adoption plan. While what the documents say differs from state to state, the purpose of them is to transfer the physical care and legal custody of a baby for whom adoption is planned from that of the biological parents to the adoptive family.
If you are reading this article, know that you are not alone. This can feel like one of the loneliest times in your life. Most recent CDC.gov studies show that 45% of pregnancies in the United States are unplanned. If you would like someone to talk to about all of your options, we are here for you. Our conversations are always supportive, confidential and professional. You are strong, you will get through this and you will make the best decision that is right for you and your baby. We believe in you and are here to help you.